PRIZED! A review and a giveaway {Winner announced}

Congrats Georgia Beckman on winning the book "Prized!"! For those of you that did not win, you can pick up the book on the website for $10 shipped!  If you order before Memorial Day, Noelle will sign it (or write a note for a gift to someone) for you!  Just mention on the order that you came from Bumber's Bumblings!

My dear friend, Noelle Toscano, just recently published a book, PRIZED! Your Journey as His Daughter. Noelle and I have been friends for almost 10 years now!  We met right after Nate and I were married and have been great friends ever since.

Prized! Your Journey as His Daughter is a fresh and inspiring new perspective on how to live as God's precious daughter.

The teenage years bring some of the most challenging experiences. Do you know that the choices you make now will affect the rest of your life?!

This little book talks about some of those deep (and not so deep) dilemmas that teenage girls face every day. Funny, sometimes intense, sometimes silly, sometimes scary, and always honest, Noelle will help you navigate through the confusing times that you will undoubtedly face.

Using events from her own life, Noelle candidly helps you in your journey as His daughter." 
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Prized! is a very easy read for the pre-teen or teenage young woman in your life.  I read through the book in one afternoon {though I'm a bit of a fast reader} and it absolutely held my attention throughout the whole book.  I found myself reliving some of my pre-teen, teen and college years and thanking God that time in my life is over.  I definitely wish I had this book to read and re-read as a teen girl.

The book is filled with relate-able stories, helpful tips, and the truth of God's word. Her recognizing and addressing making and maintaining friendship is truly a pivotal part of a teen girl's life. She also addresses understanding and relating to parents, the crazy word of dating, and realizing your full potential as God's beloved child.

You will want to buy one for every young woman you know!

If you have a young daughter, niece, granddaughter, or friend, this is a wonderful gift.

The book is also being used across the country as a book study in church youth groups.  Noelle has also written a leader's guide to go along with it, PRIZED! Your Journey as His Daughter - Leader's Guide.

Purchase the book on Noelle's website for free shipping!

Now, for the giveaway! Noelle is graciously giving away one a signed copy of this book to a lucky winner!  All you need to do is use the handy-dandy box below and follow instructions to enter the giveaway. There are several different ways to enter the giveaway, beginning with leaving a comment on the blog with who you would give the book to!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Sending a hug

Sending a Hug

It all started with a playdate with my friend, Melissa  and her sweet twin girls. It was a little wet outside and we were growing weary of the bickering over toys.  We decided to help them with a craft that they could send to their grandparents that live far away, as both of our children's do!  I remembered that B had received several rolls of this paper for his birthday from his grandparents.  

We laid each child down on their back on the paper and traced their head and stretched-out arms. I don't have pictures of this because it was quite the feat for wiggly four year olds!

We then taped the outlines of each of them to the kitchen floor with painter's tape so it would be easy to remove from the floor and paper.  We equipped them with a ton of markers, colored pencils and crayons and let them create!

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This was just a couple weeks before Mother's Day and the week of my sister's birthday.  He wanted to make one for Aunt Dee-dee, as well!  

I tried to roll them up and send them, but it made more sense to fold them up and send in an envelope I already had.

What a fun surprise they had when they opened the packages!

Mothers Day 2013

"A child born to another woman calls me Mom. The depth of the tragedy and magnitude of the privilege are not lost on me" 

-Jody Landers 

I read that quote on Facebook yesterday and was so impacted. They are words I think of so often, but they don't come out quite so eloquently.  

This past Mothers' Day weekend, I was able to once again, spend time with Ash, B's birth mom,  celebrating together, both as mothers to an amazing little boy.  Our schedules didn't allow for us to have  an evening to ourselves like we were able to last year, but we spent the day with B and Lah-Lah, which was great! 

Ash spent the night on Friday night and had the chance to see, first hand, how exciting it is to leave the house for the day with two children.  Our first stop was for iced coffee; my new addiction, compliments of my precious 6 month old still not sleeping through the night.  No complaints, just thankful for coffee.

It looked to be a rainy gloomy day, but we still decided to brave Longwood Gardens.  

I am so glad we did!  Usually weekends are slammed, and especially holiday weekends.  Thanks to the gloomy weather, the place was quite sparse and the sun finally did come out!

I know, I wasn't exactly dressed nice for the occasion.  I've been having some ankle pain and really needed to wear my running shoes. I didn't want to be that mom wearing running shoes with my skinny jeans, so I dressed appropriately

Here are the outtakes from trying to take a picture of us three!

I love this one of these two!  An extremely vibrant conversation about how the pizza boxes are used  without all of them falling down!

I am overwhelmed with thankfulness to have Ash in our lives.  The magnitude of the privilege is not lost on me.  

At times we wonder if we are sharing too much. We, as a family, are trying to really think about what and how we share on-line and how it will affect B and L down the road.  

When we were together on Saturday, I received a message from a friend of mine that made both me and Ash cry, "Hey friend, just want you to know I've been thinking about you a lot lately. My relationship with my foster son's mom is growing. I keep thinking about your courage. What it takes to let Ashley in on the intimate details of your life. Thank you for setting such a Godly example, my friend. He really used you to open my eyes when we met last year. I will be picking my foster son's birth mom up today for his 1st Bday party. Just wanted you to know what you are doing is changing lives......."

This is one of the countless messages we have received that lets us know that sharing our hearts is worth it.  If more people could break down those walls of insecurity and fear, there will be more children out there that don't have to choose between biology and legalities.  I know, first-hand, every situation is complex and this extreme openness is not always best for all parties.  But even an opening of your soul to your child's first or birth families will give your child permission to ask questions, to wonder, to be okay with missing what his life could have been.  And I know that is hard stuff, but what is harder in my mind, is forcing a child to stuff those emotions away and not deal properly with their emotions, which can cause irreparable damage to their mind and spirit.  

If a mother and father can love more than one child then why is it so hard to understand that a child can love more than one mother and father? - Unknown


Also, please stop over to Open Adoption Bloggers and read an interview that Ash and I did for Mother's day!

Week in Review

Hi there!  I can't believe it's been a week since I blogged!  I write most of my blogs and upload pics on my Blogger iPhone app and there was an update last week that was terrible.  All the pictures came through blurry and wasted too much of my time trying to fix all of them.  Soo frustrating!!  I am speaking at a women's event at a nearby church on Saturday and have spent my blogging time praying and preparing for my message.  If you are the praying kind, I would appreciate your prayers for me!  

I'm popping on to deliver some fun pictures from this week and say that I have some fun giveaways and recipes coming up in the next few weeks!  

Happy Mother's Day to my wonderful Mom!!  Pulling out an old school picture of us.  Yes, I went through a red hair stage. 

Check out this amazing rainbow over our neighborhood this week!

On Wednesday we spent the whole day at home since I ran over a nail the day before and needed to take it to the shop later that day.

B was my cleaning buddy and did a great job with his chores and kept asking for more!

We also had a dance party to God's Great Dance Floor !

They cuddled for 5 seconds before she pulled his hair and he screamed! 

She squeezes my cheeks and gives the biggest slobbery kisses.  Wonder where she learned that from? 

He was growing weary of the Mammarazzi!! 

 What a character!!  

 Shout out to my buddy, Vertical Mom, for sending me an amazing package this week!! Yup, those are full-size bags!! 

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!!

Lah-Lah is six months old!

My dearest Lah-Lah,

You are six months old. You are growing up so fast. I forgot how fast this time goes by and how much babies change right before your eyes!

You weigh 18.5 lbs and are 25.3" long. You are 85% for weight and 50% for height! My back is starting to show the proof of just how chunky you are!! I absolutely love your chunky thighs and chubby cheeks! But your little back wrinkles are still my most favorite thing ever.  You've had them since you were born!

You started doing an army crawl this past month, right around the same time as your brother did when he was your age. You, thankfully, aren't quite as fast as he was, except if I leave the room. I'm sure to find you across the room! 

You learned to love your bath time and just love the water!

You also have fallen in LOVE with your daddy!

In addition to those adorable little bottom teeth, you are working on SIX up top, that I can see! 

Attempted your first Starbuck's drink.  Good taste, baby girl.  {don't worry, she can't suck from a straw}

Slept through your first fishing trip {to the creek behind our house}

Still enduring constant "help" from B!

You are not interested in anything from a spoon.  We've, so far, tried grapes, bananas and avocado in the mesh feeders.

Love riding with Mommy in the ErgoBaby Carrier.

What a privilege to be this sweet baby's mommy!  Everyone always asks, is she always this good.  Yes, pretty much, unless those little teeth are bothering her, which usually means skipping afternoon naps.  

What TO SAY or DO for your friend struggling with Infertility or is a new Adoptive Parent

My good friend Lori and I are teaming up again to finish our series on Infertility and Adoption Etiquette. We often get asked our opinions on how to care for someone who is struggling with infertility or transitioning to adoption. Last week, we recognized National Infertility Awareness week with the start of this series addressing what not to say (and what not to do) when helping your waiting friend.  Today we are going to share our thoughts on what to say and do during a time of anticipation.

Written by Lori

1. Ask how you can care for them.  Do they need to talk about it? Do they want to be the ones to initiate it in conversation? Do they want for you to avoid all baby talk conversation? Do they need to tell you what “being sensitive” means to them? Do you need to check in every few months with them (regarding infertility)?  Only the individual struggling with infertility can answer these questions.  Please ask! Your friend won't bite... I promise. :)
2. Listen.  Listen. Listen. As in, unless your advice is asked for, keep it to yourself.  Pushing treatments or alternatives because you know someone who tried XYZ or adopted and now they are enjoying a blissfully happy family are someone else’s success stories. If you don’t have personal experience, the conversation ends there and your friend has just heard about (yet another) happy family (that isn’t hers).  Instead, if you know she needs to talk with someone who understands what she’s going through, ask her if she’d like to connect with the happy family.
3. Pray for them (and let them know). I’ve found that even if people aren’t particularly religious, they welcome prayers in times of trial.  Unless they are staunchly Atheist, it’s usually an appreciated gesture to show your love for them.
4. Send them cards of encouragement.  Cards don’t warrant a response (like emails do).  It’s simple and delivers the message of love.  Just remember, sympathetic cards are to be avoided.  Your friend wants your love, empathy and friendship- not sympathy .
5. Offer quality time.  Your friend may need an emotional boost.  Go get a mani or pedi (or both!).  Put on ‘the pretty’ and dress up for a dinner out.  Make it fun.
6. Mother’s Day. Just like your single friends loathe Valentine’s Day, your friends struggling with infertility will loathe the fact that they aren’t celebrating Mother’s Day.  This would be a great time to send them a card.
7. Share your heart.  Saying that you’re heart breaks for them is a good thing.  It lets them know that you care without the no-no phrases (i.e I can’t imagine what you’re going through; I know I don’t understand but I know it must be hard; I feel awful that you haven’t had any luck yet) click here and here to read to previous posts on what to avoid saying and doing.

Written by Amber

I only know the domestic infant adoption side of things, so I'll be sharing a few of those, as well as a few I gathered from friends that have adopted internationally.

1. Throw a baby or adoption shower. We may lack 9 months of pregnancy, but to have our friends be so excited for this life that has come into our life and celebrate with us is important.  Talk to your friend to find out if before or after the baby/child comes home would be best.
2. Meals. Our church does a really great job of providing meals for new parents for several weeks when the baby arrives home. Many times the emotions of the adoption process is so heavy that it does have physical side effects, along with a new baby or child not used to the family's routine or country!  We had friends bring us meals for at least 6 weeks, which was amazing {thank you, wonderful friends}.  My friend, Melissa, said that when they returned from China, "Something people did was stocked our refrigerator and freezer with meals when we got home from China. It's was three weeks before Christmas and they even decorated our house and tree to surprise us! It was overwhelming coming home to that...in a good way".
3. Educate yourself - for close family and friends - Whether it be open adoption, international, attachment and bonding. Ask what books they are reading and what you can read along side them.  I wish I would have heard this before we started in this open adoption journey. I think it would have been very helpful to our friends and family to understand the decisions we were making.  My friend, Melissa, says this, "A very special friend basically read everything there is to read about attachment and bonding with a newly adopted child just so she would be able to understand what we were going through. She is always asking how she can better support us and doesn't think we are crazy for the very intentional way we are parenting Gideon. She thinks it all makes perfect sense" and another friend, Nikki, says this, "My MIL read one of the adoption books and still mentions things that are in the book. My mother did not read any books, but has always paid attention and really seemed to get what we were trying to accomplish with the attachment in the beginning."
4. Ask what you can do to help. Don't forget to ask the new adoptive mom, just as you would a new mom of bio children, if there is anything you can do to help.  We did not have much notice for Lah-lah, so my needs were helping to care for big brother. He needed a lot of extra attention and love those first few weeks.  Our friends were so great at recognizing this!  Many friends came and helped fold laundry or organized baby clothes.
5. Be a listening ear.  Don't be afraid to ask questions about where things are in the process or how things are going, but don't be offended if they can't share that information. Also, be sensitive to little listening ears when you do ask your questions
6. If your friend is still waiting for their child - the answers are pretty similar to the IF ones above. The waiting is so difficult. Take them out to lunch, window shopping at the mall, drop off their favorite starbucks drink to them, send a card, give them a hug, tell them you are praying. REJOICE with them in any advancement in the process, just don't ask them constantly for an update.  Trust me, they will tell you!
7. Acceptance - an adoptive mom friend of an older child through international adoption said that friends with similar aged children immediately began including their child in birthday parties, play dates, and so on. Even if their child isn't ready for social situations like that, an invitation is so special!

We hope this was helpful.

We love our comments and appreciate your feedback.  We also understand that everyone feels differently and only intend to express our thoughts based on our personal experiences.  If you’d like to add more insight feel free to add helpful comments below.